Vicki loved the color green, collected flamingos in all shapes and sizes, and adored her lab, Roxy. She still slept with her teddy bear, and loved The Little Mermaid. Her college roommate described how, when a boy she liked came over once, Vicki blasted the song "Kiss the Girl" from her bedroom in the hopes the young man would take the hint and make a move on her friend.
And that's just how Vicki was. She was an irrepressible goofball, who said she never had any intention on growing up. Her youngest sister's last memory of Vicki happened two nights before her death. Vicki was teasing her about not knowing what classes she should take in college and the teasing escalated into them throwing candy at each other and their mom telling them to stop because the dogs would eat it and get sick.
But despite being a child at heart, Vicki was serious about her work. She had wanted to be a teacher since she was a teenager and she was always very directed in that goal. She was a double major in college and graduated with high honors. Her instructors said she always absorbed everything they said, but then would come up with ways to relay the information to kids of all different levels and aptitudes. The teacher she did her student teaching under said Vicki had raw talent and instinct and that, despite her 30 years of teaching, she learned more from Miss Soto than she ever taught her. The day Vicki got the job teaching first grade at Sandy Hook she called her aunt, who was also a teacher, and was bursting with excitement.
Vicki was always striving to be a better teacher. She stayed late after school creating billboards and lesson plans, or picking up books at book fairs. She was going back to school to get a Master's degree in learning disabilities - not because she wanted to be a special ed teacher, but because she wanted to be better at helping each and every one of her students reach their fullest potential.
After the tragedy I heard a gem of wisdom somewhere... I really don't recall when or where... something that stuck with me, and something that I noted to tell my kids about the whole scenario. It, fittingly, came from Mr. Rogers:
"When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, 'Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.' To this day, especially in times of 'disaster,' I remember my mother's words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers – so many caring people in this world."
On that horrible day it took only one person to ruin so many lives - to show us the very worst of human kind. But, in the wake of those actions, we were also witnesses to the very best of humanity.
Miss Soto became a super hero that day. She hid her kids in a closet, some under a desk and more behind a partition, and then she did the unthinkable. She boldly stood there, all alone, and faced down what she surely knew was her death. There is no doubt she had heard what happened in Miss Rousseau's room next door, and yet she did not hesitate, she did not waver. She bought her kids time, and she ultimately paid with her life. Sadly, she could not save all of her "angels" but her quick thinking and bravery did save the majority of her class - 13 children are alive today because of Miss Soto.
So, in tribute to Miss Soto's selfless act of protector, I decided I wanted to do my Act of Kindness today for some other protectors.
The 26 lives that were cut short certainly weren't the only victims that day. The rest of the students and staff of the school will surely have to face tough times ahead. But I think that morning will always haunt the police officers and other first responders who answered the call. I can't begin to imagine - nor do I want to - what they went through that day. One officer told little Olivia Engel he loved her as he held her in his arms while she passed away. They fully expected to need ambulance after ambulance to transport the wounded... and then, heartbroken, they realized there was no need.
The Newtown Police Department and other agencies that responded are requesting to the Governor of Connecticut that they should be able to file for treatment for post traumatic stress disorder. Well, they certainly deserve at least that. And they deserve our thanks.
This weekend I will write a letter of thanks and condolences to the Newtown Police... but for today I honored another group of officers.
One lesson I learned today: Police officers are unbelievably hard people to do an act of kindness for! My friend, Julie, also tried to do an act of kindness for the police and found out the hard way they're not allowed to take gift cards (as it is seen as a "payoff"), no matter how well intentioned or random it is.
I knew that going into this, so I called my friend whose husband is a deputy in the sheriff department and picked her brain a bit. Could they accept movie vouchers? Nope, same thing as the gift card. What about food? Could I bring in bagels or cookies or something? Sadly, they likely won't eat it, because the climate of the world today is such that they can't trust someone walking in off the street and doing a good deed. How do they know I'm not the girlfriend of someone they just put in jail and I've come to seek revenge by lacing cookies with something?... Sigh.
I decided I'd just have to be a little covert and sneaky, and mysteriously leave some Starbucks gift cards on some cops' parked cars. So I got some gift cards, put them with an Act of Kindness note and into ziplock baggies (it's Oregon, rain is inevitable) and then I left for a long run. I told my husband, as I ran off, if he got a call from the jail that it was because I'd been busted for doing an act of kindness. He promised he'd bail me out.
So I ran down to the police department. I got stopped at some traffic lights kiddy-corner from the police station and I spotted a squad car parked in the parking lot. Hallelujah! But just as I was crossing the street a policeman came out of the building toward the car. Shoot! So I circled around the little mini mall adjacent to the station while he drove away. I saw another couple of squad cars, and just as I was going to go over to them another policeman walked out of the building. Seriously, it was comical at this point. It really shouldn't be this hard to do something nice for police officers. I circled the block again, and the next time I came around no one was in the parking lot, and several police cars were parked there, so I stealthily put the gift cards under the windshield wipers of the cars, terrified the whole time they were watching me on some kind of surveillance equipment and would come arrest me for tampering with police property. Thankfully, they didn't. I ran away (literally... maybe it's good I ran because then there's no license plate to track!) and was nervous every time a cop car passed me the rest of the run home.
I hope that the officers who get those cards are appreciative and actually use them! I have a feeling Vicki would have been snickering away at my antics today, had she been watching me from above. It seems like the kind of thing the brave goofball teacher would have appreciated.
Thank you, Miss Soto - Vicki - for teaching us that super heroes do exist and that love wins in the end.
"No one has yet realized the wealth of sympathy, the kindness and generosity hidden in the soul of a child. The effort of every true education should be to unlock that treasure." - Emma Goldman
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